Doom

I feel utterly helpless. I am plunging towards an abyss I dug for myself through my slacking and laziness. I wish so much I had been more hardworking, had more foresight, had been more disciplined. But I know, deep down, I don't deserve good grades because of my lack of discipline. I changed, but only in the last 2 weeks. Two weeks isn't ample time to fully grasp 2 years' worth of advanced level education. Why hadn't I spent these 2 years wisely?????

I detest myself. I feel so unconfident and I know this mindset will cripple my performance. I hope I won't feel this way on the days itself. I really hope I won't..

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